Reduce the drama

[drewan]

(Edit: If you see yourself in this post... don't worry. This isn't my passive aggressive attempt at telling you something. This is not targeted toward anyone specific. This is a general post about the drama in our lives. If you can take something from this and improve your life, great! If it doesn't apply, them hopefully this post will be amusing and your will just move on to the next post. And please, do not leave a comment justifying your drama. We all have problems.)

Can we start a NO DRAMA day on LJ? Or maybe a Drama 12 Step Program.

"Hi, my name is Andrew. I'm a drama'holic. I know I'm powerless to the drama."

(Here is where I tried to take the AA 12 Steps and modify them for Drama'holics, but it just got really stupid very fast, so I stopped. Maybe you can do it better.)

Those of you out there who are prone to lots of drama in your lives, did you ever think that maybe it's YOU. What are you doing that's feeding the drama? What can you do to stop the growing drama? STEP AWAY FROM THE DRAMA!

I have to admit, even I am a bit of a drama'holic. I've been pretty good about not creating to much drama in my life, but if I sniff out some drama happening around me, I have to go investigate and find out what's going on. It's like rubber necking while driving past a traffic accident. I'm trying to change that. If I hear about your drama, I'm not going to ask what's going on... because it's none of my business. If I drive past an accident, I'm not going to even look at it, keeping my eyes firmly looking forward. (Though if I have passengers I encourage them to look so they can tell me what's going on.)

If you have an honest problem that you need some help with, then I'm happy to help you work towards a solution. If you just need to vent, I'm happy to listen. But if you need are looking for a reaction to your situation that does anything but try to calm and end it, then I'm not going to be able to help you.

(Yeah, this whole posts sounds pretentious, and a bit like drama itself. This is written more for myself than you. It's to remind me that it is better to walk away from the drama then get myself involved.)

Tips for reducing the drama:

1. If someone wrongs you, forgive her or him and move on.
2. If a situation is unfair, either live with it or leave. Life is unfair.
3. The only person that you are truly responsible for is yourself. Well, unless you have kids. Then you are responsible for them too, but only until they are 18. (Edit, thanks to cakmpls) You can try and teach them how to reduce drama, but sometime children (and adults!) don't listen.
   
4. Some times you have to be the bad guy. Be direct and don't prolong the pain. Get in, do what you need to do, and get out.
   
   (Right now I can't think of any more drama reduction steps. Can you think of some good ones? Oh... I have a good one... "Don't write long posts about why you hate drama!)
   
   (Edit: Here are a few more added by friends...)
   
   
5. In the Grand Scheme of things, does it really matter? (added by benpanced)
6. If it's good drama, sell the screenplay to Television. (added by stormecho)
7. Drama is probably the opposite of fun. So if you get more fun in your life, you'll probably have less drama. Check out The eight principles of fun. (added by jbru)
8. Sit up straight, lace up, put on your game face. We're playing Hockey here folks! (added by mizzlaurajean)
   

Remember, drama belongs in the garbage, not the recycling.

Comments

[benpanced.livejournal.com]

5. In the Grand Scheme of things, does it really matter?

[drewan.livejournal.com]

Oh, that's excellent!!!

[stormecho.livejournal.com]

6. If it's good drama, sell the screenplay to Television.

[drewan.livejournal.com]

Yep, that's dead on.

[jbru.livejournal.com]

Drama is probably the opposite of fun. So if you get more fun in your life, you'll probably have less drama. Check out The eight principles of fun.

[drewan.livejournal.com]

Oh, I like those! Thanks!

[jbru.livejournal.com]

Hey! Didn't you just post about all the work you have to do? ;)

[drewan.livejournal.com]

Yes... you're point?
;)

[mizzlaurajean.livejournal.com]

Sit up straight, lace up, put on your game face we're playing Hockey here folks!

[drewan.livejournal.com]

That's a good one too!

[cakmpls.livejournal.com]

Those are great, but if you have any idea how to implement the third sentence of #3, bring it on. We have three kids who are low-drama, and one who is over the top, so I kinda think it's her, not J and me.

[drewan.livejournal.com]

Ha! You're right. Children aren't robots, you can't make them be what you want. Sometimes your influence has a stronger result. Sometimes that are going to be who they are no matter what you do.

[cakmpls.livejournal.com]

Oh, they're always going to be who they are. We knew going in that we couldn't make them be who we want--except that who we want them to be is themselves. But a cone of silence would be nice now and then.

[alisgray.livejournal.com]

reducing drama:
1) be happy for other people, be happy for yourself.
2) say when you need help, ask for what you need.
2a) if you don't want to know the answer, don't ask.
3) be able to laugh at yourself first. find the absurd and cherish it.

[esprix.livejournal.com]

Meh. Sometimes drama amuses me, and so I choose to become a part of it. Other times, not so much, so I choose not to. Depends on how the wind is blowing... :)

[huladavid.livejournal.com]

Somewhere around here I have a copy of the Klingon 12 steps that I wrote as a cover to Stipple-apa. Can't remember 'em but do recall that the speaker starts it goes something like this:

"Me name Krog. Krog KLINGON!"

"Hi Krog. WE HATE YOU!!!"

Fistfight ensues...